Fire the workers; kill all the lawyers.

OK, so I'm not really advocating that she take Shakespeare's advice. Simply ignoring the lawyers for a while would do just fine. Take no heed of the memos on the State Personnel Act. Don't take their calls. Don't go knocking on their doors.

And fire the state employees.

Fire the Division of Motor Vehicle workers who believe it's a fine thing to be wined and dined at fancy steakhouses on the dime of a company that's about to be awarded a no-bid contract by the state agency.

Fire any state Highway Patrol troopers not already given the boot for being unable to keep their pants zipped.

Fire the Highway Patrol captain who headed then-Gov. Mike Easley's security detail and seems to believe that destroying public records is a superb idea.

Fire the administrative law judges who defend this behavior.

All right, she can't actually fire administrative law judges. Too bad.

The fact is, these scandals put a big, fat stain on state government.

In water cooler conversations, the Highway Patrol has become the butt (no, not that kind) of endless jokes. Average Janes and Joes, whose typical contact with state government involves speaking to their child's teacher or renewing a car registration, come to see all state agencies as filled with depraved, greedy slackers.

Dedicated, hard-working state employees -- and plenty of them are out there -- become more slandered than anyone by the actions of some that seem incomprehensible to most.

Most have difficulty imagining the thought process of DMV workers who believe it's just dandy to enjoy a high-dollar meal at the Capital City Chop House, paid for by Verizon, just before the agency delivers a no-bid contract to the same Verizon Business.

Most have difficulty imagining how a Highway Patrol trooper, caught having sex on the way home from a Christmas party, could then have the audacity to proclaim that he should keep his job.

For some, no amount of public humiliation is enough.

So, Perdue needs to clean out the rats' nest.

Don't mind the nervous Nellies. Don't worry about the legal gobbledeegook. So what if the state is sued? It will probably be sued anyway.

If it is, in every court hearing thereafter, people will be reminded that their governor did the right thing, that she had become as tired of this garbage as the rest of us.

Fire them. Fire them today.

A few years ago, I was told that then-Lt. Gov. Perdue, while interviewing a potential staff member, wanted to know whether the person was "tough enough."

In a rather interesting turn of events, the people who hired Perdue want to know that same thing about her today.

Here's her chance to show them that she is.